I'm Gonna Kill You: 10 Things People Do That Really Piss Me Off

by Miss Lizard

No need for witty prose. Let's get down to business:

• Escalator hogging: It's a concept people. Stand to the right, pass on the left. Isn't that universal? (this also goes for those people mover things in the airport, any staircase...Pretty much any public space that )

• Compact parking spaces: It says COMPACT for a reason. So get your gas guzzling monstrosity out of the spots reserved for itty bitty cars like mine. Sorry you have to walk a little farther-that's life.
  

• Spitting in public: WHY??? Do you really think I want to see your coughed up phlegm? I mean, when I'm sick I like to look and see what color mine is, but keep your mucus to yourself. Gross!
  

• Cell phone usage: I know, I know. It's the modern age and they are a necessity, but there are certain places you should not have a conversion..Do you HAVE to talk so loud we hear every word? It's like the louder you talk, the more important you feel. Keep convincing yourself, buddy. And what makes you think I want to hear your boring conversation anyway?? 'Nuff said.

• Catch Phrasing: Please don't latch on to the latest "in" phrase and then use it to death. Despite what you may think, saying "that's hot" to every thing I say is SO NOT HOT (sorry Paris!)

• Carry on Luggage: Why the airlines haven't cracked down on this, one will never know. Here's a little rule I use, and maybe it will help all you guilty travelers out there. If you are going on a trip where you will be gone for more than 2 days, I'd bring a bigger suitcase and CHECK it. Checking baggage is included, free of charge, to every passenger. So stop bringing your life on the plane with you just because you're too lazy to wait in baggage claim. Shame on you!!

• Babies: specifically loud, obnoxious babies. I don't own any yet, so I'm sure my view could change. But please parents-smack them around, get loud, whatever must be done to shut the screaming child up. Nanny 911, help!!

I could go on for days, but then I'd never get any real work done. Let's all share the really annoying, horrible things that just make you wanna just strangle someone. I'll feel better knowing my kind is out there. Strength in numbers. Oh mi god, that's so hot!